How does this excerpt from my story sound?

I wanted to go to sleep, but was afraid to. It feared that I would not open my weary eyes and might wake up to heaven’s light. I fluttered my eyes and drifted off into a brisk lullaby, only in hopes that I would not sleep for too long like Sophie already had. When I was cut off from the background, I had had dreamt of a field that was flooded with fire and my skin was blistering from my sweat. Desperately, I was searching for my boundless break through the craters of hell. The heat had engulfed me in my chest and I could no longer scream, I fled towards a hill and dropped to my knees, crying for the undying pain to end. Hastily I awoke, with Nounou , Papa, and my brother, Bastile at my bed side. They had not been able to remember to explain to me that I had been in a comatose state for some time. Papa made his way toward me and pressed his lips upon my forehead, and telling me that I was going to be fine and that my fever had finally broken. My body was quivering and quaking with ache of the cold ice that was pressing against my skin. I ran my fingers along the chilling crevices and cracks that were made by the intensely cold rocks. I was so frail that I had felt like a rag doll.